Sunday, February 26, 2012

Six Sentence Sunday - 5






Writers are encouraged to post six sentences from a work-in-progress or published piece. Sign into the Linky at Six Sentence Sunday, and visit other SSS participants.

This snippet from SAINT SANGUINUS takes place when 6th century Welsh warrior Peredur was a boy of eight.

This takes place just after the men of Yn Wyddfrid return with his father's body, following a battle.

~~~~~~~~

I clutched tight to my little sister, rocking her as she matched Mam’s cries.

I couldn’t shed tears because I refused to believe. My heart seemed frozen, my sobs not yet formed even though my eyes saw and my ears heard.

After a very long time, some women from the village arrived to join their cries with Mam’s. One young girl walked up the hill to our hut, gazing down at me with sorrow, her face wet with tears. She wordlessly reached for my little sister, who stretched her arms out for the girl and her more practiced way of holding a wee sister.

8 comments:

Cate Masters said...

Poignant scene. You nailed his character's voice - good work!

Anonymous said...

Great job! You captured that numb/disbelieving stage of grief very well!

Zee Monodee said...

So sad and poignant...

Wendy said...

This is very sad, and powerful. great six!

Karysa Faire said...

*snif* How sad. Very well written! You captured the shock of death so well.

JoAnn Ross said...

Oh, as others have said, that's so poignant! And I loved his inability to believe/accept. That's especially so male. Good job!

Taryn Blackthorne said...

great 6 Julia!

Travis Cody said...

I thought your writing during the scenes of Peredur's boyhood was some of the best in the entire book.