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Monday, September 10, 2007

Poetry Train Monday - 18 - Liberation

Believe it or not, I wrote this in grade 11 after recovering from my first broken heart. My first boyfriend and I broke up and I spent a year being single before starting a new relationship with my second boyfriend. Clearly, not a casual dater!


Liberation

How freed my soul
With blinking eyes
That smart at light
Weep tears at day

My soul, whose cell
Carved far below
Dripped with mildew
Rats and cold

Clung fast at first
To slimy stones
With unworn nails
Afraid

To breathe the dust
And not let go

Now bent, my soul
Could feel the sun
Shrivelled flesh
Sprung pink with life
My trembling bones
Felt sick with joy
Stumbling clear
Before I knew

I think of you
But dream no more
I wonder
Would I rush
Back to the dust
At your late call

Who knows at all
To fall

Copyright 1981 Julia Smith
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21 comments:

  1. Amy RuttanSeptember 9, 2007 at 10:27 PM

    Ooh great poem Julia.

    I haven't posted mine yet. I'm watching Test the Nation.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Lisa AndelSeptember 10, 2007 at 12:54 AM

    11th grade? Great job!
    Especially: I think of you
    But dream no more.

    Very insightful for that age.

    ReplyDelete
  3. JillSeptember 10, 2007 at 7:27 AM

    That ws greatly done for someone that was just 16 or 17 at the moment!!(Would be great now too!)
    Seems like that broke-up affect you a lot!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. The RainmakerSeptember 10, 2007 at 8:13 AM

    Deep...keep 'em coming.

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousSeptember 10, 2007 at 9:59 AM

    "My soul, whose cell
    Carved far below
    Dripped with mildew
    Rats and cold

    Clung fast at first
    To slimy stones
    With unworn nails"

    That had me thinking. Great work for a 11th grader.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Red GarnierSeptember 10, 2007 at 10:22 AM

    Great poem, Julia, so beautiful. This part...ooooh.
    Especially: I think of you
    But dream no more.
    Love it!!! =)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Robin L. RothamSeptember 10, 2007 at 11:13 AM

    Wow, that's awesome! You were one deep high school girl. :D

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousSeptember 10, 2007 at 12:49 PM

    "...Dripped with mildew
    Rats and cold..."

    Lord 'Tunderin' Jaysus, girlfriend! Rats need lovin' too!
    Poor rodents always get the bad end!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Susan Helene GottfriedSeptember 10, 2007 at 12:50 PM

    Not just a deep high schooler, but mature, too. No wonder you're such a neat adult.

    This is one of those poems I'd like to print and hang on a wall somewhere. I get that whole re-emergence into the light theme.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Sparky DuckSeptember 10, 2007 at 1:32 PM

    Love and torment do a great job of being poem fodder

    ReplyDelete
  11. Dara EdmondsonSeptember 10, 2007 at 1:39 PM

    Your talent was evident early on. Very touching.

    ReplyDelete
  12. AnonymousSeptember 10, 2007 at 1:59 PM

    This is beautiful. I'm astounded that you had this level of clarity as such a young age, I still don't have it.

    ReplyDelete
  13. AkelamaluSeptember 10, 2007 at 2:41 PM

    A lost love remembered.

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousSeptember 10, 2007 at 6:32 PM

    You still have something from 11th grade? WOW!

    I remember break ups at this age. UGH!

    ReplyDelete
  15. T.A.ChaseSeptember 10, 2007 at 8:14 PM

    Wonderful poem, Julia. Very mature for a high schooler.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Julia Phillips SmithSeptember 10, 2007 at 10:27 PM

    Susan - feel free to print away!

    ReplyDelete
  17. AnnSeptember 11, 2007 at 10:26 AM

    Great poem, Julia.

    ReplyDelete
  18. RhianSeptember 11, 2007 at 10:46 AM

    amazing talent already showing when you were just a young thang.
    loved this:
    "Shrivelled flesh
    Sprung pink with life
    My trembling bones"

    ReplyDelete
  19. AnonymousSeptember 11, 2007 at 8:07 PM

    Beautifully written, Julia!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Camille AlexaSeptember 11, 2007 at 8:57 PM

    I adore teenage love poetry! It's just a thing with me.

    ReplyDelete
  21. AnonymousSeptember 19, 2007 at 8:59 AM

    Remember and never forget

    ReplyDelete