The Queen's Meme - Mission Impossible

Mission Impossible Meme

In honor of the 40th anniversary of the Moon Landing










1. You are a guest on the space shuttle. You just arrived on the moon and realize you forgot something back home that you can't live without. What is it and how do you convince them to go back and fetch it?















My asthma puffers! Definitely can't live without them. When one of the astronauts cracks a really dark joke, I start laughing uncontrollably. This leads to much wheezing, tears and clutching at my throat - while still laughing. That's when the missing puffers are discovered. Or rather, not discovered. Luckily, the astronauts are a bunch of smarty-pants people. They rig up some concoction or other, and in ten minutes or so the wheezing settles down.

But then the same guy cracks another joke...

2. Pretend you are a teacher in a rough public school for one day. You have been assigned to teach Manners 101. You have the "challenging bad butt kids" class (remember this is a pretend school and anyway I can't say ass on my blog 'cause it's so unQueenly and I might get fined or something). They are jumping up and down, cursing, and throwing things at you.
What is the first thing you would write on the board?





First, I would use my Scorpio Dragon Death Glare to freeze all the rowdies in their tracks. This is the greatest weapon in my personal arsenal. I've used it my whole life, and it never lets me down.

Next I would invite whomever was willing to admit they didn't know the answer to my question to write the answer on the board, once we reviewed it in class. This would hopefully keep the disrupters from wanting to advertise their inadequacies. And for students truly interested in learning, it would facilitate discussion and push everyone a little farther along the learning curve.

3. Someone in your family or a friend has started a blog. They think it is anonymous but you have figured it out. They are saying derogatory things about you. Do you tell them or do you read it for awhile? How would you handle it?

















I read it, comment under a different name and wait. Wait for that perfect moment - perhaps a gathering of peers - to mention a tidbit along with my incognito name that only the offending blogger would recognize. Then I watch the blogger's skin go pasty pale.

4. If you had one dollar left in your pocket, what would you spend it on?



















A coffee. I often spend my last dollar on coffee. That's how I know.

5. President Obama and the First Lady are coming over for dinner. What do you serve?



















Once they arrive, I tell them to pile back into their limo. We're heading out to The Sou'Wester out at Peggy's Cove for fish and chips and gingerbread.

6. You walk in on your lover. He or she is trying on your clothes. What do you do?


















I tell him he looks very fetching.

Then I join him, and we goof around until the clothes come back off again...













7. Every astronaut must have shots! Choose your vaccination: You only get one and you can't enjoy any of the attributes of the other choices. You choose either:
(1) The fountain of eternal youth and sexual vigor but only for 10 years
(2) perfect health for a lifetime
(3) eternal mind-numbing nirvana and peace of mind
(4) unlimited hedonism for one year with no negative consequences.


Perfect health for a lifetime sounds awfully good to me, right about now (reaching for my painkiller...)

Luckily, I've got another acupuncture session tomorrow. A really intense weather system rumbling through has finally worn me down, migraine-wise - but it took a whole week. I've been abnormally able to withstand a really bad week with low pressure systems socking us in.

But I do have to sigh with relief that it's Friday.

To play along, visit Mimi at The Queen's Meme.

Mimi Lenox says "The astronauts are a bunch of smarty-pants people" cracked me up.

Ms Snarky Pants says Muhaha Your brand of evil payback. It warms my heart. :D

Dorte H says Hilarious answers! LOL I liked the one about the unruly kids.

Thursday Thirteen - 116 - 13 Things About Travelling 25 Years Back in Time

1 - Setting the scene

Last week I told you the romantic tale of the first Tall Ships festival that came to my home port of Halifax, Nova Scotia. The year was 1984 - I was 19, my sister was 16, and a trek down to the waterfront to see the huge Russian tall ship resulted in my sister and one of the Russian sailors falling for one another.

We met the Kruzenshtern again when it sailed into Sydney Harbour in Cape Breton, Nova Scotia. Michelle and Rashid spent every second together, as if it were the last they would ever see of each other.

Because it was.

After writing to each other for two years, Rashid was drafted into the Soviet army and presumably sent to Afghanistan. Though my sister and I had obtained travel visas and were planning a trip to see Rashid in his hometown, political reality crushed their plans - and we never heard from Rashid after that.


2 - Fast-forward 25 years to 2009.

After living in Toronto for over a decade, both my sister and I returned home to Halifax. I'm now married and my sister is in a long term relationship with a truly wonderful man.

When we heard that the Kruzenshtern was due to arrive in Halifax this summer for the 2009 Tall Ships event, we knew we would go aboard her together - for old times' sake.


3 - Last Thursday, July 16th, all the ships arrived in port and I went down to the harbour front on my own to see them.

It was a heart-swelling moment when I first laid eyes on the masts of the Kruzenshtern high above Pier 23. And definitely bittersweet.

The route for the tall ships event included stops in Hamilton, Bermuda and Charleston, South Carolina - and between those two ports the Kruzenshtern lost the top half of the foremast in nasty weather.


In this 1984 photo, you can see Rashid waving to my sister from the middle yard, just to the right of the mast.


The part of the mast where he stood is now missing.


The remains are now secured on deck.


4 - On Sunday, July 19th, my sister and I drove over to Halifax, parked in the south end and walked down to Pier 23. Though the configuration of the docks has altered in 25 years, the Kruzenshtern was moored in the same basic area as it was when we spent all those hours talking to him over the side of the ship. Its immense size means there's only one real place it can be accommodated - where the modern cruise ships now dock.

Rashid once stood where that Russian cadet stood, at the bottom of the gangplank. That's how we met him in the first place. We just started chatting with him. Imagine.

Of course there was a line-up to get aboard. We had to wait for a bit, until enough visitors disembarked.


This is my sister once again boarding the Kruzenshtern after all these years.


5 - Surreal!


Talk about Flash-back City.


Everything on deck was just as it was when we were last aboard. Except for our missing friends, of course. Especially Rashid.


6 - Some things were exactly the same, but so many things were magically different. See where Rashid was standing in 1984? During the time when the Iron Curtain was in place, most of the Kruzenshtern was off-limits to the public. Only the central section of the upper deck was allowed to visitors, including my sister and me - even when we got secretly waved aboard when Soviet officials were elsewhere.


On Sunday we were allowed to roam the entire length of the deck, from stem to stern. This shot was taken from the same location where Rashid stood in the picture above.


7 - The flag that flew from the stern of the ship in 1984 was of course the red hammer and sickle of the Soviet Union.


This time it was the restored flag of the Russian Federation.


The traditional Russian flag was first flown in the mid-1600's, and was restored to use in 1991. After a 70-year blip, Russia is Russia once more.



8 - In the some-things-don't-change category: apparently I'm a big fan of salmon pink.

This is me wearing salmon pink capris, standing beside Valery in 1984.


And this is me wearing a salmon pink t-shirt, standing beside one of the ship's wheels this past Sunday.


9 - But you can bet there weren't any tables selling souvenirs in 1984. The evils of capitalism, don't you know.

This year, however, I bought myself a lovely baseball cap with a picture of the Kruzenshtern embroidered on the front, along with the name in Cyrillic script.


10 - In the knock-me-over-with-a-feather category: When the Kruzenshtern was here in 1984, the Soviet state was officially atheist. Although when the universe kept smoothing the way for my sister and Rashid to spend time together - when everything was stacked against them - the Russian sailors often pointed to the sky and indicated they believed God was stepping in.


But who knew this magnificent chapel was hiding behind water-tight iron doors aboard ship?


Just amazing.








11 - We'd never seen this beautiful carved bench before. But it looks old enough to have been already old in 1984.


It was up there on the aft section of the deck.


12 - The thing that touched us the most about this visit from the Kruzenshtern was seeing one or two Russian cadets free to roam around Halifax however they wanted.

In the Soviet era, they were barely allowed off the ship - and then, only in groups of a dozen or even twenty. Accompanied of course by official minders.

Not anymore!

Before we left the ship, we talked to an extremely handsome crew member - I'm serious. He was model-gorgeous. We asked whether there was a Rashid Kamalov on board.

We didn't expect him to be there - and he wasn't. Rashid was a cadet from a marine college when we met him, and the sailors aboard the current Kruzenshtern are cadets from the same college. But there is regular crew, as well, so we had to ask. Just in case.


13 - The Parade of Sail took place Monday, beginning at 12:00. Lucky for me - yes, really really lucky! - I work right down on the waterfront. And my lunch is from 12:00 to 1:00. I enjoyed the Parade of Sail with tons of other people. I love hanging out with the masses.

However, the Kruzenshtern is the diva of the tall ships, and didn't head into the harbour until I was back at work. I was quite down about missing her, but my friend Tracy raced past me on her way to see the ships at 2:00, saying, "The Russian one's going now!"

I asked one of the women from my team to cover my position for five minutes while I raced out and caught the Kruzenshtern making her majestic way along the harbour.


I knew it would take awhile for the ship to make its way down to my building. I returned to work for a bit, then asked my manager if I could high tail it back to the waterfront to watch her depart. Of course he said yes!

Here the Kruzenshtern follows behind the Cisne Branco from Brazil.


Goodbye, beloved.





Hope it's not too long before I see you again.



Here's a time lapse camera version of 2009's Parade of Sail.

The tall ships appear at the 1:20 mark.

When the fire boats turn on their spray at the 2:45 mark, the parade is officially underway.

The Kruzenshtern enters the harbour from the right at the 4:55 mark, and is seen best at the 5:12 mark.



Janet in Michigan says I am so happy to find one of you girls. Oh I can't believe how much you look like Aunt Sheila in the photo where I can only see your nose and eyes.

Hootin' Anni says Love the memories, and the time forward to today. Great idea.

Hazel says I must say my heart sank when I read - "Because it was." Can't help wondering where could Rashid be now.

Wordless Wednesday - 109

Dorothy says Now that's a journey!

Shelly says Wow. What a ship.

Akelamalu says Superb!

Through the Opera Glasses - 23 - First Kiss, Destiny and Meeting God

Michelle Johnson over at Poefusion takes part in Manic Monday, hosted by Fleur de Lisa - and for today's Through the Opera Glasses I thought I'd focus my sights on her prompt.

As you may recall, I'm taking part in Kim's Blog Improvement Project, and the latest challenge is to once again shake up our normal offerings. We're encouraged to post as many different types of blog posts as we can by July 24th.

"It’s easy to get into a pattern of writing the same kinds of posts over and over again," Kim reminds us. "But sometimes it can be fun to spice it up."

Here are Michelle's prompts:

When and with whom was your first kiss?

Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?

What would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

I'm going to put an arts twist on this prompt, since this is my arts feature.

First kiss - My own first kiss was with my first boyfriend, Philip. For more details, check out my story in my Naughty Meme of Firsts.


When I think of a perfect depiction of a first kiss, I can't help but think of the final scene in 1995's Persuasion.

It occurs at the 5:50 mark in the clip below.





But of course, I can't rule out the kiss in North & South.


Warning ladies - watching this scene may turn you into a puddle of goo...





Does everything happen for a reason? - Well, let's see. When I first moved to Toronto 23 years ago, I worked as a live-in nanny in the west end of the city. I went over to a movie theatre to fill out an application for evening and weekend work - at the Humber theatre - and began walking east along Bloor Street. Not west. East.

I wanted to start meeting people with similar interests to mine. I figured movie theatre people would be a good start.

Not too far along I saw a sign for psychic readings. I thought, what the heck? So I went up. I didn't keep going along the storefronts as I normally did.

The young woman read my palm, and among her observations she was adamant that my soul mate was very near. She mentioned that he wore a uniform. Since I was brand new to the city with only two friends from home also in Toronto, plus the family for whom I worked, I thought, don't know how that can be.

When I was done, I went down the stairs to the street. I kept walking east along Bloor Street until I got to another movie theater I hadn't even known about. It was the Runnymede Theatre. So I went in and applied.

I was called to start work there not long after. One of my co-workers was a very handsome usher named Brad Smith. To whom I'm now married.

I absolutely think everything does happen for a reason. In the same way that thousands of people gather for a performance at the same place at the same time, the universe arranges significant events in order to facilitate each person's potential for growth. The universe has the ticket with the date and time. It's our job to sense when the curtain is about to go up.


A wonderful film with this outlook is Serendipity.





What would I like to hear God say when I cross over? - I would like to hear: Rest, now.



A truly chills-inspiring meeting-up-with-God scene for me is the ending of The Fountain. The music really thrills me.



So... What about you?

Thomma Lyn Grindstaff says I had fun reading your Naughty Meme of Firsts. :-D

Ms Snarky Pants says I love how you met your husband! That's a great story!

Michelle Johnson says I can't believe you worked at a movie theatre growing up. I did too. But, I didn't meet my second husband there.

Poetry Train Monday - 110 - Forest Bed

Saturday would have been my friend Pam's birthday, so I was thinking about her all day. She passed away a year ago last week.

Today's found poem is taken from a prose writing exercise from March of this year at my writers' group. We were doing a workshop on color, and I had to write something focusing on the color green.

Who else could I think of for green but my Eco Hero friend, Pam Langille?
















Forest Bed


Deep
In the Acadian forest
I sit

Under the canopy
of fir trees
Deep

Green needles sway
In the breeze
Filtering the light

Through greyed
Brown branches
Emerald green leaves

Poke through the firs
Beech and birch
Bright moist green moss

Coating fallen trunks
Gathered back
Into the soil

Soft feathery green
Lichen clings
To rock

The rock that marks your place
Your place is among the roots
Of the shining ancient hemlock

Soft
Little
Green

Needles draped
Over
Your forest bed

- Julia Smith, July 19, 2009 / original text March 2009













Ride the Poetry Train!


Ms Snarky Pants says Oh that's beautiful!

Michelle Johnson says Pam's smile is exuberant in your photo.

Nikki says Why do friends have to die?

Summer Stock Sunday - 8

If you've been following my tale of my sister's once-upon-a-magical-summer-romance (scroll to previous post) you'll recall that my last glimpse of the Russian tall ship Kruzenshtern was in 1984, as she sailed out of Sydney harbour in Cape Breton, Nova Scotia.

It was the first tall ships event here in Nova Scotia, and my sister had fallen for a sailor aboard the Kruzenshtern - a hard thing to do, when you recall that in 1984 the crew was monitored at all times by Soviet authorities aboard ship, and the cadets were kept in groups if they went ashore, and kept aboard at all other times.


















It was painful to say goodbye to Rashid Kamalov, a cadet from the marine college in Kaliningrad. That's him at left with a fellow cadet on that last morning, when my sister and I drove onto the wharf with an official pass she'd gotten from a Canadian sailor so we could see them off.



















They exchanged addresses in the days before internet and email, in the days before glasnost and the fall of the Iron Curtain.


















It seemed to take forever - but finally an air mail envelope arrived in our mailbox.

It was from Rashid.

My sister had sent letters to all three addresses he'd given her: the college, his mother's and his grandmother's. But his mother and grandmother - being concerned, I suppose, for their son and grandson - didn't pass along the letters from a dangerous foreign girl in the age of the KGB. Rashid spent time at home after returning from his around-the-world trek thinking Michelle hadn't written to him. The letter my sister got whispered of the hurt he'd felt, while brimming with hope that she still might return his feelings.

Michelle wrote back, assuring him that all was just as it was when he'd left Canada.


















Finally he returned to the college - and a collection of my sister's letters waiting there for him.

Thus began a two-year correspondence between my sister and Rashid. We even obtained travel visas and planned a trip to see Rashid in his home town of Yaroslavl.

But one day a post card arrived, in Rashid's old-fashioned handwriting, telling my sister he'd been drafted into the Soviet army and would be there for two years. In 1986, the Soviet Union was deep in their war with Afghanistan.

We've never heard from Rashid since. Our family moved from the address he had for Michelle. He was obviously no longer at the college. His mother wasn't a reliable contact. And very likely, he served in Afghanistan.

We've Googled him, naturally. Hunted for him on Facebook. I discovered there's a soccer player named Rashid Kamalov. Not our guy, of course.

25 years have gone by. My sister has found a partner in a truly wonderful man named Newt.














But there's always been a hanging thread dangling from that summer so long ago. Rashid has never left our thoughts. How could he?

So this past Thursday, when the Kruzenshtern once again sailed into Halifax Harbour for Tall Ships 2009, I made a beeline for the four-masted Russian barque.

When I rounded the corner by the park in front of the train station, and saw the huge masts high over the top of Pier 23, I literally grabbed my chest over my heart.
















My sister and I are going aboard the ship tomorrow during public visiting hours. But I couldn't wait to see the ship - I went down by myself after work, happy to have this time to get close to such a huge figure from our past.

As I walked along this road towards the ship, I passed two men in civilian clothes speaking Russian. How my heart soared with joy that things have changed so drastically. They can get off the ship without official babysitters dogging their every step.
















But look at the sailors! They're so cute.

And so young...















For more Summer Stock Sunday, visit Robin at Around the Island.

Ms Snarky Pants says Well there is one Rashid Kamalov on Facebook... Yes, I had to search. ;) Just call me a Facebook stalker, even in stories that have nothing to do with me. hehehe

Michelle Johnson says Surely the technology we have these days would yield something. Have you tried Twitter?

Mama Pajama says I am glad that your sister has found happiness...I hope Rashid has, as well!