Monday, July 28, 2008

Poetry Train Monday - 59 - How Can I Ache For What I Never Had


I've done a backstory poem for my new character, Scorpius. It helps to get a handle on his inner dialogue.

Scorpius is Chamberlain of the Keep for Lady Elysande. The story takes place in a medieval-flavored slave-owning society.







How Can I Ache For What I Never Had


My bed belongs to my mistress, blanket and all
My keys are to her Keep, safeguarded stone
My ankles drag with phantom shackles
I hear them still, each moment I’m alone

My lineage is suspect, thus my role
My father may have strode before me
As I bowed before my lady’s guests
Wondering every time, could this man be…

My mother may have cried and fought
She may have hoped and schemed
I’ll never know, and never cease from wondering
Am I the man that either of them dreamed?

My tunic is the finest she can buy
My face and form are pleasing, for she smiles
My lips have brushed my lady’s hand, and yet
I long to kiss her foot, to lay in homage on those polished tiles

- Copyright - Julia Smith - July 27, 2008

11 comments:

Thomma Lyn said...

Oh, I like your poem, and I like Scorpius's voice! What a great idea, a backstory poem to get a grip on a character's mindset.

I've given you an award on my blog! :) Come see!

gautami tripathy said...

I love this. I am posting at read write poem for you. It works great as a ballad.

deeply in love with dracula's daughter

Julia Smith said...

Oh joy, Thomma Lyn!

Oh joy, Gautami!

Missy said...

Very moving and powerful. I really love this.

Jill said...

I like the way you see how Sporpius is wandering if he is a good man and the fact that he is thankfull for what she give him.

Joy Renee said...

'My ankles drag with phantom shackles
I hear them still, each moment I’m alone'

great hook into his psyche. there would be a pandora's box of motivations rooted in ambivalence between that and:

'I long to kiss her foot, to lay in homage on those polished tiles'

i hope the lady is worthy of such honor. ah, but there's the rub eh?

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

Wow. That ending was NOT what I was expecting. Cool twist, most definitely.

Julia Smith said...

Thanks for the wonderful comments, everyone! Scorpius is very new to me - I'm still in the infatuation stage.

Bobbi said...

Nice! Don't you just love that first infatuation with a new character?

artpredator said...

my my my!

i remember another poem with these characters from a few weeks ago, yes?

i think you're related to sheharazad of the 1001 nights...you know how to create tension!

Karina said...

Just so you know, you are fast becoming one of my very favorite writers, and the reason for that is you have managed to interest me in a genre I've never been into before, because I love the way you write it! I want to know more about Scorpius after this...you always leave me wanting more. ;-)