A to Z Blog Challenge -- X is for our Xanadu Pleasuredome Travelling Sisterhood of Forever Friends

Welcome to Day 24 of this year's A to Z Blog Challenge where --
   

  

X is for our Xanadu Pleasuredome Travelling Sisterhood of Forever Friends

In the 13th century, Mongol ruler Kublai Khan held court at a summer palace in Xanadu, the Mongolian name for modern-day Dolon Nor. When Marco Polo wrote about his visit to Xanadu, he mentioned the "Palace built of cane...It is gilt all over, and most elaborately finished inside...The construction of the Palace is so devised that it can be taken down and put up again with great celerity." 

Fast forward six centuries, and poet Samuel Taylor Coleridge based his Romantic-era unfinished piece Kubla Khan, or A Vision in a Dream, A Fragment upon Samuel Purchas' account of Xanadu, itself based upon Marco Polo's writings:

"In Xanadu did Kubla Khan

A stately pleasuredome decree"

In modern-day popular culture, Xanadu is synonymous with Utopian splendour. Knowing that the original palace in Kublai Khan's Xanadu was a temporary construction to house his court brings me to my high school friends Dawn, Maureen and Shelley, and our four-decades-long friendship.

photo by Maureen Kemp

We met in the late 1970s when we all sang in our high school choir. At that time, our student population was large enough to require a row of portable classrooms running alongside the back of the main building, including our beloved music portable where we basically spent all of our time.

This is a shot of a typical gathering of music students enjoying some early summer sunshine just outside the portable, likely during our lunch break. The four of us are in the top right of the shot: In red, Mark, then Alanna, Shelley, Maureen, Dawn and me.

photo by Maureen Kemp

Even the portable is now dismantled. Our creative haven, where we rehearsed for choir performances and musicals, attended music classes and chilled out if the space was free is now an empty spot of asphalt behind the high school.

L to R, above: Dawn, Alanna, Michael (standing,) Mark (seated,) me and Shelley

Yet the bonds we forged during those years held us close, through those initial flying-the-nest university years when we scattered across North America, when our trips home at holiday times meant the first of our travelling pleasuredome constructions.

In picture above: Maureen at left, middle row / Shelley at center, bottom row / me beside Shelley, second from right, bottom row

Just like the Kublai Khan's transportable summer palace, we made our joys whenever we found ourselves together at a crossroads in our various life paths.

Through many moves to many cities between the four of us, now settled into two of us on the east coast (Shelley and myself) and two on the west coast (Dawn and Maureen,) we've nevertheless managed to attend each other's weddings whenever possible, welcome children and celebrate many life milestones together. 

Something that we do every now and then is organize a Girls' Overnight if we all four happen to be in the same place at the same time.

photos by Maureen Kemp

This was one of those overnights at a Halifax hotel. They always begin with a dinner out at a restaurant where we catch up and talk and laugh.

photo by Maureen Kemp

Toasting to our Xanadu with my former dance partner Dawn.

L to R: Dawn, me and Alanna in a can-can performance at the end-of-the-year variety show the music students used to produce ourselves, June 1981

Nowadays, the kids are starting to graduate university. That's me sitting beside Maureen's daughter at one of the get-together dinners, also including Shelley's longtime friend Krista.

photo by Maureen Kemp

This year we've been celebrating 50th birthdays. Happy Birthday, Shelley!

And last year, a 50th anniversary with Dawn's parents.

When I launched my debut novel in 2011, Shelley was there to celebrate with me. It's now been re-launched as Vampires, Saints and Lovers.

In our four decades together, we have sometimes come together in order to bid farewell to departing family members. At those times, it has been a source of strength to sit shoulder to shoulder as we shed our tears.

photo by Maureen Kemp

Most of the time, we set up our pleasuredomes to celebrate those moments when our paths cross and our smiles provide the pillars for the palace.    

Thursday Thirteen - 171 - 13 Reasons It's So Much Fun to Have a Girls' Overnight

Two weekends ago I got together with my high school choir friends. In case you're wondering, that means we've been friends for thirty - that's right, thirty - years. Want to see what we got up to?









Photo by Maureen K



1 - All of us grew up here in Halifax, Nova Scotia. All of us moved away. Then two of us moved back home. Whenever the other two are back to visit family and friends, we try to get together for a Girls' Overnight.

This year we had a staycation urban getaway, right here in downtown Halifax.














2 - We stayed at the Halifax Marriott Harbourfront Hotel, and got a super sweet deal on a King Suite. It was the first time I'd ever stayed in anything so luxurious.










Photo by Dawn D

L to R: Shelley, Maureen, moi

3 - I should have realized something was up when I knocked about three times and no one heard me. Then I realized there was a doorbell - so I pressed it, and there was Dawn.

She let me into a gorgeous room with a king-sized bed, a chair, flat-screen TV, desk, a bathroom off to the side. Very nice, I thought. Wow, this is going to be a fabulous Girls' Overnight.











Photo by Maureen K

L to R: Shelley, Dawn

4 - Dawn nodded to the right. I turned my head.

There was a connecting door, and a vast room opened up beyond. I moved through the door, somewhat disoriented by the unexpected palatial digs.

And squealed, "Maureen!"

She'd been in Nova Scotia several weeks ago for a family celebration, and was not expected for this weekend together. But Shelley had gotten on the phone and coaxed her to grab a flight - and there we all were.










Photo by Maureen K

L to R: Dawn, Shelley, moi

5 - First thing on the agenda - Shelley's signature Lemon Drop Martinis.















Photo by Maureen K


6 - Shelley had to improvise with the wine glasses provided at the in-suite bar, but she's nothing if not an intrepid martini maker.

Serious chillaxin' then got underway.










Photo by Maureen K

L to R: Yours truly, Shelley, Dawn

7 - Altogether too much happiness, don't you think?










Photo by Maureen K

L to R: Dawn, Shelley

8 - We strolled along Upper Water Street to our dinner reservation at Ristorante aMano down at Bishop's Landing. And the talking stopped for no man.









Photo by a very helpful server

L to R: Krista, Shelley, moi, Maureen, Dawn

9 - We met up with Shelley's close friend Krista at the restaurant, and so commenced several hours of talk-talk-talk, laugh-laugh-laugh, sip, sip, chew, chew, talk-talk-talk, laugh-laugh-laugh.










Photo by Maureen K

L to R: Me, Dawn

10 - Dawn and I shared a bottle of prosecco. I first tasted this Italian version of dry champagne at our inaugural Girls' Overnight in Wolfville several years ago. One sip of this ambrosia and I was hooked for life.














Photo by Maureen K



L to R: Dawn, Krista

11 - When we got back to the suite, we found a tray of specialty cheeses and duck prosciutto, with a bottle of cabernet and a note from the chef.

The surprises just kept coming!

I never did mention what the 'king' part of the king suite meant. We ended up with the bedroom I described, with its own bathroom; a closet so big you could have slept in it; a seating area with a sectional sofa, fireplace and a second flat screen TV (neither of which were ever turned on); a second seating area with four armchairs (which we kept gravitating towards); a long marble bathroom; a dining table that seated eight; a rollaway cot for me tucked over by the harbourside windows; a bar and a kitchenette.














As we sat there marvelling at how the other half lives, we agreed that we could have easily fit forty people in there for a party, and there still would have been room to move around.














L to R: Dawn, Shelley

12 - Maureen had a wedding to go to the next day, so she couldn't stay for the overnight part. In the morning, we ordered room service and crowded in close at one end of the vast Citizen Kane table.














L to R: Dawn, me

13 - I just read over at Diana Frey's blog that the friendships formed between women are amongst the healthiest things we can do for ourselves. (For guys, the healthiest thing is to form longterm bonds with women - no joke.)

Here's a snippet from her post:

"Spending time with a friend is just as important to our general health as jogging or working out at a gym.

There's a tendency to think that when we are 'exercising' we are doing something good for our bodies, but when we are hanging out with friends, we are wasting our time and should be more productively engaged - not true.

In fact, the head of psychiatry at Stanford said that failure to create and maintain quality personal relationships with other humans is as dangerous to our physical health as smoking. So every time you hang out to schmooze with a gal pal, just pat yourself on the back and congratulate yourself for doing something good for your health.

Let's toast to our friendship with our girlfriends. Evidently it's very good for our health."














L to R: Me, Shelley

Apprentice Writer says Holy cats. I want to run away from home and move to Halifax. Darn sense of maternal responsibility!

Adelle Laudan says I go to a ladies PJ party every year. There are about a dozen of us and we laugh until our sides hurt.

Lovesmukiwa says What I would give for a getaway with my closest friends. I think I'll start a bucket list!

Wordless Wednesday - 160

Naquillity says Sounds like you had a great time with your friends. And you won, yeah...

Harriet says Haven't played Trivial Pursuit in years!

5 on Friday - Set 25

Travis at Trav's Thoughts invites everyone to lay down a short set of music that takes their fancies for his 5 on Friday meme.

Tonight I'm heading out for a Girls' Night with two of my high school choir friends, since Dawn is in town from Seattle, Washington. For a bit of a trip down memory lane, here are five pieces we performed together when we were in the Prince Andrew Chorus, from 1979 to 1982.

1 - Thank You For the Music - Riverport Chorus of Wisconsin in rehearsal

This was something we did in our end-of-the-year variety show. At the time, there were no arrangements available for choirs for this one or for One Voice, so our friend and even-though-he-was-a-student-himself-he-was-our-musical-director Mark Morash whipped up his own arrangements.

Thank you for the music
The songs I'm singing
Thanks for all the joy they're bringing

Who can live without it?
I ask in all honesty
What would life be

Without a song
Or a dance
What are we?

So I say thank you for the music
For giving it to me

- Andersson / Ulvaeus



2 - One Voice - Cantabile Youth Choir of Warwickshire, England

For our performance of this one, Mark detached himself from the piano bench and entered the stage alone, beginning the song as one voice. As it went along, the entire chorus joined him so that we completed the song as a choir.

Just one voice
Singing in the darkness
All it takes is one voice
Shout it out and let it ring

Just one voice
It takes that one voice
And everyone will sing

- Barry Manilow



3 - Potiphar - Donny Osmond and cast of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, 1999

Joseph was the first musical I was in, and it will have a special place in my heart forever.

Not only did it give me the rush of performing without any of the stress of carrying a featured role, it introduced me to the whole thrill of falling for my first boyfriend, who played Joseph. This was the part I waited for, during every rehearsal and finally during every performance. I was obviously drawn to the men-in-chains scenario early on.

Letting out a mighty roar
Potiphar burst through the door

"Joseph, I'll see you
Rot in jail!
The things you've done
Are beyond the pale"

Poor, poor Joseph
Locked up in a cell
Things aren't going well, hey
Locked up in a cell

- Lloyd Webber / Rice



4 - Hernando's Hideaway - Briana Gantsweg and Mark Peterson, Interlochen Arts Camp production of The Pajama Game

In grade 11 we did The Pajama Game, where I played Mabel, the secretary of the main love interest. This song-and-dance number was my favorite. I was part of the choir for this one and could relax and have fun.

Just knock three times
And whisper low
That you and I
Were sent by Joe

Then strike a match
And you will know
You're in
Hernando's Hideaway! Olé!

- Adler / Ross



5 - Dream Ballet - Josefina Gabrielle and Hugh Jackman, 1999 London West End production of Oklahoma!

For my graduating year, we did Oklahoma! Dawn was off to university by then, but Shelley and I were in this one. I played Ado Annie, the overly-flirtatious girl caught between two beaux.

I also choreographed the musical numbers along with fellow student Heather. Being young and unaware that we shouldn't tackle something as daunting as a 15-minute dream ballet sequence, we worked out the steps and held our own rehearsals. And I'm very proud to say it wasn't half bad. We even included the fight between Curly and Jud - but of course Hugh Jackman wasn't available at the time, so our Curly didn't do any complicated lifts.

Thursday Thirteen - 99 - 13 Questions for Ian Lurie, Co-Author of Web Marketing All-in-One Desk Reference For Dummies

Once upon a time, there was a lovely girl named Dawn who went to high school and joined the choir. That was also my high school, and I joined the same choir - and Dawn and I became friends, along with a whole group of other choristers. Dawn and I shared a love of dance, and often choreographed dance pieces together for various shows which the choir would stage, besides the full-scale musicals.














This is the Can-Can we did for the end-of-the-year show that we put on for Dawn's graduating year (sniff - a sad goodbye to half of my friends.) That's me at left and Dawn in the center.














Our group of friends naturally went our own ways but always stayed in touch, seeing each other as often as we could. This is a bunch of us out for dinner in Halifax when Dawn and Maureen were back on the east coast to see their families.

Clockwise from L to R: starting with yours truly at far left, my husband Brad, Dawn, her husband Ian, Shelley's husband Hugh, Maureen and Shelley.

Ian always writes up the holiday newsletter, and from the first one I read I was impressed with his razor-sharp wit and his ease of conversational style. I was thrilled when Dawn said, "Oh, I've got something for you," on one her trips home and passed me a copy of Ian's first book, Conversation Marketing, released in 2006.

So imagine how I had to pick my jaw up off the floor on another of her trips home, when she said, "Ian's writing a Dummies book!"

Needless to say, I've been anxiously awaiting this release. And now - it's out.














Ian shared his excitement with blog readers when his book arrived at his office. Here he introduced his book to his grandfather's old typewriter.

Ian's got a wonderful promotion going on over at his blog, Conversational Marketing:

"If you buy Web Marketing for Dummies All In One, and send me a great unboxing photo, I'll send you a free copy of my e-book The Fat Free Guide to Copywriting (previously known as the The Unscary, Real World Guide to SEO Copywriting.)" - Ian Lurie

CLICK on THIS POST and scroll to the bottom for your chance to win!

For my 99th Thursday Thirteen, I'm doing my first-ever interview with Ian Lurie, President of Portant Interactive, an Internet marketing agency. Welcome, Ian!

1 - What is Portent Interactive and how did you come up with your company name?

'Portent' means an omen or sign of things (good or bad) to come. So much of what we do involves anticipating changes to the internet and particularly search, so it made sense. The 'Interactive' part I'm sure you can guess :)


















2 - How did Web Marketing All-in-One Desk Reference For Dummies get its start?

I'm not sure how Wiley decided to write it. But John Arnold, the book's editor and author of the e-mail section, read my blog and decided I was a well-qualified Dummies author. He contacted me, and once I realized it wasn't a put-on we got to work.

3 - Your company offers services in Social Media Marketing, which features blogging. How can your company help someone increase their blog traffic?

The number one way to increase blog traffic is to write great stuff. So we offer a lot of coaching on good web copywriting. We also help clients interact with relevant communities online. And, of course, our search engine optimization team works with many bloggers to improve their search engine rankings.

4 - What is Search Engine Optimization, and why is it so integral to growing an internet presence?

For Portent, Search Engine Optimization (known as SEO) means ensuring a site's visibility, relevance and authority through great content, link building and a technically sound web site.

Search engines generate 75% of everything that happens online. If you don't do SEO you're ignoring 75% of your potential customers. If you can afford to do that, more power to you, but most businesses should make SEO the core of their online strategy.

5 - Many authors are encouraged to start blogs if they haven't already done so. How important is it for an author to blog, or will a high profile presence in other social media such as Twitter and Facebook be enough?

Authors are particularly good bloggers. We love to write and can't really shut up. So blogs give us an outlet. It's also an excellent way to promote your books, and connect with other writers.

I don't think every author must blog, though. Blog if you enjoy the instant gratification of writing something and publishing it moment later. Don't blog if you're going to regard it as a chore, or if the internet gives you the willies.

6 - Did you ever envision yourself as a For Dummies author?

I never envisioned myself as a CEO or a father of 2 kids. It's safe to say the For Dummies gig is a complete surprise and tremendously exciting.

7 - Do you know the other three authors personally?

I didn't know Marty, John or Michael before we wrote the book. I haven't met them in person and really want to organize a get-together at some point.

Elizabeth Marsten is the head of my PPC (pay-per-click) department at Portent. I suggested that she write the PPC section. She's fast becoming one of the top PPC specialists in the country, and she was a natural for the job. Oh, and if anyone reading this tries to hire her away, I'll burn their office down.

How did the four of you decide who would write which section?

If I remember right, we all talked on the phone and handed out the sections. Marty wrote the first section on building a web site. I wrote the Search Engine Optimization, Web Analytics, Social Media and Blogging sections. John wrote the section on e-mail marketing. Michael wrote the section about mobile marketing. And Elizabeth wrote the PPC section.

8 - What if a person is a true 'dummy' when it comes to technology? Suppose a writer has no cell phone, prefers to write with pen and ink, and posts snail mail instead of blog posts? Will that person be able to understand Web Marketing All-in-One Desk Reference For Dummies?

A total luddite might have some problems. They'll figure it out, but I strongly recommend learning to use a computer first. Otherwise the book becomes a doorstop in a hurry.

9 - I have been a passionate blogger for two years now. But there are still aspects of blogging that confuse me. For example, I still don't know how to tell who visits me without leaving a comment. How important is it to know who visits your blog?

There's no easy way to know which individuals visit your blog. If there was it'd represent a significant invasion of privacy (in my opinion).

However, you can easily measure total visitors, what folks most often read, and where they come from using a free analytics tool like Google Analytics.

And, if you implement a social networking tool like Google Friend Connect, you can see when other members of that network visit your site.

10 - As a member of Romance Writers of America, I was seriously thrilled to hear through the grapevine that I had buzz at last year's national conference in San Francisco - especially since I was not physically present at the conference. The buzz was generated purely through my blog relationships.

As I mentioned, it is definitely encouraged within the writing world for authors to start blogs as a marketing tool. But what if the author is not attracted to blogging and finds the whole thing a tedious, nails-on-a-chalk-board chore?

Then they shouldn't blog. Really. Blogging isn't a responsibility. It's another form of communications. Don't do it if you don't like it.

I'm not surprised you got buzz. Your blog is great!

11 - Web Marketing All-in-One Desk Reference For Dummies includes a Google AdWords redeemable coupon worth $25. How would that help a writer doing promotion for a new release?

That coupon will let you get $25 worth of clicks on Google AdWords for free. Adwords is Google's pay per click advertising system. It works like an auction: You bid on keywords. When someone clicks your ad, you pay the bid amount.

If you can get some low-cost traffic, that $25 can get you 100 or more clicks for free. That's a nice way to start!

12 - What is page tagging and how would writers benefit from understanding web analytics?

Page tagging can have multiple definitions. 'Tagging' is adding non-hierarchical keywords to pages. That creates the now-ubiquitous 'tag clouds' you see all over the place.

Page tagging as I think you're using it here means adding extra stuff to links, like ?source=google, so that your web analytics package can provide you extra information about your visitors. It's a VERY powerful tool. I can't go into it here because it would take about 10 pages, but you can find several articles about it on my blog, Conversation Marketing.

13 - In your opinion, how would a beginning author best spend her marketing dollars? What would be the top three internet options that give newbies the greatest buzz for the most affordable price?

Blogging can get you the most value, if you start well in advance of your book release date. Your blog can create a built-in audience who's ready to read your book the moment it hits Amazon.

Definitely have a simple web site, even if you don't have a blog.

Also, join Facebook and connect with other members who have interests in line with your book. Don't spam people, but make a few friends.

Finally, do look at pay per click marketing. It's a very efficient way to generate traffic.

Oh, and read Web Marketing for Dummies All In One Desk Reference!

Thanks so much for the interview, Ian. Can't wait till I get my own copy of your book in my hot little hands.

Thanks Julia - I really appreciate the interview!

How Do You Sleep? Meme

Mimi Lenox, the originator of the Blogblast For Peace also reigns as the Queen of Memes. Here's one I thought looked enticing...perhaps because it's Friday and I'm SO-O-O tired after a full work week that followed 11 glorious days off between Christmas and New Year's.

This picture of me lounging on a luxurious bed was taken last August when my friend Lisa came for a visit. We stayed a few nights over at the Westin Nova Scotian Hotel. What total bliss that was.


1. How long do you sleep each night?

Ah...during my wonderful, precious vacation I immediately reverted to my night-owl schedule. Hit the sack at 3:00, 3:30 (am) - got up at 9:00, 9:30. So 6 hours did me wonders. I used to sleep for 7, if left to my own devices. That would probably be the case again if I were to be off work for longer than a week.

But I hate to admit that I stumble my way through the work week with an average of 4 and a half hours of sleep. I generally get off the computer by 11:30 or 12:00, then need wind-down time on the couch with the Pack (my husband and our dog.) Then I transfer into bed by 1:00 or 1:30.

It's not that I want 4 and a half hours of sleep. It's my job starting at 8:30 in the morning that totally screws things up.


2. Do you fall asleep easily?

I don't bother trying to go to sleep unless I'm sleepy. If I attempted to go to bed at 10:30, I'm quite certain I would lay there with 'insomnia'.

So once I do head for bed, I'm out like a light the minute my head hits the pillow.


3. Do you fall asleep at times not in your bed?

I snooze on the bus on the way into work and on the way home. And I definitely crash on the couch when I curl up with the Pack. It's so comfy on the couch with Xena curled up next to me, or with my legs draped over my husband's lap. It's heaven, really.


4. Do you listen to music or use white noise to sleep?






When I'm on the couch, my husband is watching TV, so I fall asleep to the sound of a movie or a TV show. But very, very low. He's become accustomed to turning on the English subtitles when I'm sinking into sleep so that he can follow the story.

I prefer quiet to white noise, but I can sleep either way. Just not loud. My supersonic hearing is not a bonus at times like that.


5. Do you sleep through the night or get up a couple of times?

I used to get up through the night once or twice, for years and years. I've been able to sleep through the night for over a year, now that I think of it. Who knows why? Haven't the slightest idea.


6. Do you have trouble sleeping away from your own bed?

When I was a kid, it took me about a half hour to an hour to drift off in an unfamiliar bed. I'd just lay there listening to all the different sounds, taking in the new atmosphere.


Now that I'm in my 40's, I'm so grateful for a little vacation or an overnight, I usually sink into the comfy guest bed and zzzz......

This picture was taken a few years ago at a Girls' Overnight in the Annapolis Valley in Nova Scotia. The Girls are my high school choir friends. This was my comfy, comfy bed...


7. Do you need an alarm clock to get you up?

Absolutely yes on work days. I'm just not an early bird.


8. Do you ever take medication to help you sleep?

Not sleeping medication, but I generally take painkiller before bed. I've got chronic pain which will absolutely keep me from drifting to sleep if I don't take something. Believe me, I've tried.


9. Do you/have you slept with pets?


I love drifting off on the couch with Xena curled up beside me. It's a completely blissful feeling to have her little body tucked up against mine. But I don't have her in the bed with me because I am an allergic person, and it's important to have an oasis of relief where my exposures are at a minimum.




Now, a-tagging I will go, a-tagging I will go...

Bogsider
Dorothy
Jennifer
Kailana
Karina

Great Way to Launch a Long Weekend

It's another long weekend here in Canada - that ever-popular Civic Holiday, which means whatever holiday is native to your particular area is celebrated on this first weekend of August. Here in Halifax it's Natal Day, when we celebrate the founding of Halifax. When I lived in Toronto, it was Simcoe Days, named after the first Lieutenant-Governor of Upper Canada.

Basically, I'm just grateful for the time off. I missed a day at work this week because of my migraine, and my husband is waiting for a third set of antibiotics to tackle his abscessed teeth before they can be removed next week. He was toughing it out in hopes of me being hired so I'd have benefits to pay for the dental work.

And now we've got the coverage! Woo! Yeah, baby! And Brad is on Tylenol 3's and sipping my mom's homemade broth through a straw. Just a few more days to go and those teeth will be history.

So it was nice to have two special events to kick off this long weekend. First, my mom met up with me and two of my friends from work who purchased prints of Mom's original artwork. We had lunch together, and then the joy began.


This is Tracy with her print of Ships at Sail.


This is Judy with her print of Stare of the Dragon.



This is Judy, the artist herself - my mom, Paulette - and Tracy before we had to head back to work.



After work, I took the bus over to my friend Dawn's parents' place where I joined her family and my other friend Shelley for a delectable dinner. This is Dawn and her mom, happy for a summer visit, since Dawn now lives in Seattle.



This is Dawn, myself and Shelley. Shelley and I went through elementary school through junior high and high school together. She lived one street over from me. We met Dawn in high school, when we were all in the Prince Andrew Chorus together.

When I got to Dawn's parents' place, there were Dawn's siblings' spouses, a brother, five little cousins and a college roommate filling the condo with a warm welcome, lively conversation, delicious yummy food and an evening that packed so much into just a few hours.


Here's Dawn with her adorable niece. Another niece offered us imaginary cookies from a container and made sure no one got left out.

So glad to get together with everyone! But I must crawl into bed. I'm plum tuckered out.

Poetry Train Monday - 41 - To Comfort You, Shelley

I wrote this poem for my friend Shelley when her mom passed away. We were in our mid-20's and not really prepared to lose a parent. I realize one is never really prepared - my uncle can't believe his 93-year-old mother is actually gone. But Shelley's loss was the first time I came face-to-face with the chill of that reality.

Now, of course, my own words reach out to me from across that 20-year divide.


To Comfort You, Shelley


The tide moves up
To hide the gash
Along the shore

Hole ripped from your life
Waves attempt to wash it clean

Sand resettles
Shifts
Hole is not so deep

When the tide moves out
The wound can still be seen

Sun bakes the salt
So it shines in the sand
These moments glisten like diamonds

When the whispery foam
Seeps in once more
You know

Though the wind has lifted her soul beyond reach
She'll return
In the way that you'll cradle your child
The songs you'll sing to her
A look in your eyes
A phrase
A gesture

She will be there
In generations you won't even know
Just as you are a part
Of those women you've never met

How fitting
That on Mother's Day
She gave herself the gift of peace
And gave you an anniversary
That will celebrate the woman she was

The tide of time
Will carry the tears out to sea
And leave behind
The wind-fresh memories
Of her strength
Her smile
Her wit
Vivacity
Charm
Command
Her beauty
And the generosity that you share

Look for her
In the raindrops
That dance upon the sea
She will be where you least expect her
And know that her love for you
Did not leave with her
But is hiding in the air that you breathe


Copyright - Julia Smith - 1988










Shelley


Photo by Maureen Kemp